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Tuesday, April 30, 2002
I’ve got Zen, yes I do! I’ve got Zen, how bout you?

I really want to have a garden this year- cucumbers, tomatos, green beans, who knows what else. I even have a really cute flower pot from the dollar shop to grow something in. The problem, of course, is that I’ve had neither the time nor money lately to get things going. I’d really like to grow a sunflower, but the problem of course, is that you cant buy a sunflower seed, you have to buy a package of seeds, and I really don’t need that many. I do not need 50 cucumber plants, I need perhaps 10.

I am sick today. I even turned down going riding, but I may still go help Monica breed later. All I really want is to crawl in bed and sleep, watch movies, and read. However, I can’t find Little Altars Everywhere, and I’m determined not to start Neverwhere until I finish all these other books I’m reading. I tried reading Sophie’s world, but my brain is too mushy right now to absorb anything intellectual. So I’m sitting with a bowl full of chocolate candy that I cant stop eating, even though I have a better-than-sex lasagna in the oven.

Oh, and I stole my mom’s zen fountain today. She got it for Christmas from one of my sisters, and has never set it up. I even connected the pump for her a while back, and she still hasn’t used it, so I officially adopted it as my own today. Its sitting on the corner of my desk next to Irwin, bubbling away. I wonder how long it will be before I accidentally knock it off and send rocks and water flying everywhere.

Earlier, I was making garlic toast in the kitchen (I just concocted my own recipe and method of doing this last night because I was in the mood for some, and had no earthly idea how to make it. Mine involves too much butter and some garlic poweder) when I heard a weird noise outside. It was my neighbor’s rooster. Yes, my neighbors got chickens. I’m way too amused by this because the area we live in is far from being farm-y. Anyway, I opened the back door to find the rooster and two chickens sitting on my back porch. Yes, chickens. On my porch. Sitting. Well, standing. I decided to share my toast with them, and I’m happy to say that I found three fans of my cooking. I was so giggly at the idea that I was feeding chickens from my back door that I grabbed my camera and took some pictures of them. The best part is that my cat walks past them like she is totally used to having a rooster standing next to her milk dish. Classic. I tell you what, between their chickens and my veggie garden, I am well on my way to being one of those people with the hand-painted signs on the side of the road that read “Fresh Eggs” and ‘Tomato Plants” like I was talking to Rich about last night. This reminds me, I really have to take a picture of these signs that I pass on my way out to Em. They are the classic hand-lettered farmer signs, but these are advertising wood for sale. One says “CEdAR” (lower-case d and everything!) and the other I cant remember, but I know the N is backwards on it. I love these signs. I want to keep them! I want to hire their maker to make me my own little “Fresh Eggs” sign.

I’m really getting pissed off that Cruel Intentions has been missing from the video store for like 2 weeks now. Why must it be the one movie I want to watch that is gone!! I am very tempted to call the video place and ask them when its supposed to be back, and if they can hold it for me and such, but that seems a bit obsessive.

While I’m on the topic, can I take a minute to rant about our video stores? There is one about a mile from my house, and one over in Hollister, which is maybe 10 miles away. They are the same company, and the thing is, neither seems to have any of the movies that the other one has. And they have VERY limited selections. IE I can find the Matrix in Hollister, but Breakfast at Tiffany’s just down the road. Neither has any movies with Marilyn Monroe (Which I NEED since I’m gonna be her on Friday!)

I kinda miss tv today. My satellite has not been working for a week, and I’m craving some Travel Channel and Trading Spaces. The thing is, when they installed it, the brainiac from DirecTV put the dish on a tree. Well, now that its spring, leaves and such have grown and are blocking the signal.

Oh, this is totally unrelated to anything (such a first for me!) but I think Cassie would be a really cute name for my mare when I get her. Or my first chick-foal. Or something.

And the good news of the day!
“* Another Epcot addition is the newly revamped ride at the Journey Into
Imagination pavilion. Figment, a purple dragon character, was part of
the original ride when Epcot debuted in 1983 -- but was dropped during a
1999 redesign. Now, the dragon is back, the upshot of popular demand,
says Brad Rex, Epcot vice president. Opening in early June, the new show
tours the Imagination Institution, where host Eric Idle, playing Dr.
Nigel Channing, explains the various departments as cars stop and start
along the nine-minute ride.”

Figment is back, baby! I really want to buy Figment (my fish!) a stuffed figment (the dragon!) or some other kind of figment souvineer. Right now he just has a figment (dragon) sticker on his tank.

Okay, thanks to Mo’s terribly amusing post about Zoo Tycoon, I really want it now. I have $70 in my bank account, and a ton of bills to pay, so I really should not buy it, right? RIGHT? Um, yeah, we all know I’m gonna end up buying it.

This no tv thing is really starting to get to me. I’ll probably end up going and renting a ton of movies tomorrow. OOH, or I could go to Springfield and go to Blockbuster! Yes! Blockbuster!

posted by Crystal 11:37 PM

Monday, April 29, 2002

So, if I ride until 5:00, I can untack, groom, put Em back in his pasture, change clothes, and drive over to Hollister all by 5:30, right? Um.. right?? Monica and I are going riding at 3:30, and we were planning on riding until 5 and then going over to breed a mare. Well, of course, then the refridgerator door of my brain opened and the light bulb went on, and I realized that I have a MK meeting at 6. And that oh! I have two models coming that I need to pick up at 5:30! Am I willing to sacrifice 15 minutes of riding time for punctuality? Being late to pick up your models is generally frowned upon, you know. However, so is showing up for a meeting with hay in your hair. But to ride for only an hour would also be a very sad thing. I’m torn! Torn I tell you!!

Isnt it sad that just when the most is going on to write about, we have the least time to write? I mean, it technically makes sense, but it still makes me sad. On days when nothing has really happened, I have plenty of time to rest before my keyboard and tell you silly little things, but on those days when a lot has gone on, I just don’t have the energy. For one thing, I think I need time to kind of clear my mind and relax before I can write, and I have had NONE of that time lately.

I got home from work on Saturday… oh, wait, have I even told you about Friday yet? Let me check. Oh holy momma, I haven’t written since Tuesday! Okay, lets go way, way back. On Tuesday, my plans had been to go ride with Susie, and then go out to Silver Dollar City with Monica in the afternoon. Susie had to work though, so we couldn’t ride, and Monica also had extra work, so she couldn’t go out either, and so I quickly went from a very full day to one with nothing at all going on. Wednesday I decided to go out and play with Emmett for a while, as I hadn’t seen him in months (Yes, I already feel unbelievably guilty about this, so please don’t rub it in.) I was very, very happy that he came right over to me when he saw me, I had this dark fear that he would have forgotten me. (Super-quick biography for those of you just tuning in who have no idea who Emmett is: “Annetts Freckles” (registered name) 6-year old chestnut American Quarter horse, 15.2 hands high, three white socks, and blaze. Colonel Freckles and Boon Bar bloodlines. Love of my life that I’ve owned for over two years now. My life. Currently residing about 10 miles north of here. Pictures can be found by clicking the Emmett link over there on the left side) Anyway, I was thrilled to see my boy, and I think it was a pretty mutual feeling. I slipped a halter on him (he practically stuck his head into the halter! Good boy!) and led him out the gate so that he could eat some grass, as he’s lost a lot of weight. I noted that it was definitely time to worm him, and he really really needed a bath, as his entire right side was caked in mud. He also had his little skin thing that he gets in the spring, so I figured I would pick up some iodine shampoo and give him a good medicated bath the next day. I talked to Brian, the guy who owns the land, and he told me where I would find a hose that I could use, and told me that he had gotten some hay about 6 weeks ago that none of the horses would eat much of, and they all lost a lot of weight. I spent about two hours with Ems without even realizing how quickly the time went. Oh, I should mention that Monica had called me up at 8am to tell me her mare was in labor, and she wanted me to go check on her. Well, I got out there at 11, and she was far, far, far from having the baby, so I thought I’d go spend a half hour with Ems, and then come back at 12:30 when Monica got home to discuss the pregnancy. That half hour very quickly turned into two hours with the Super-Horse, so I missed getting back to see Monica by a long shot. (side note-almost a week later, still no baby.)

On Thursday, I got up extra early so that I could drive up to Ozark (about 25 miles away) to get some horse wormer and iodine shampoo for Emmett. The wormer even came with a free bag of horse treats, which made me happy, because Em is one guy who loves to eat, and I was almost out of my usual treats. I drove back to Emmett, and got some grain from the shed, which I mixed the wormer in with. Now this is not general worming practice—you’re supposed to stick the paste-filled syringe in their mouth and squirt the stuff up in there, but this is really not a pleasant experience for any of the parties involved. So, in my book, mixing it with a little grain is the way to go, and Emmett agrees 100%. After that was taken care of, I led him up to where the hose was and let him eat grass while I gave him a much-needed bath. I think I got enough hair off of him to build an entire pony, he was shedding his winter coat. About a half hour later, I had a shiny clean horse! I let him eat grass for a little bit longer so that he could dry off a little bit (I had forgotten to bring my sweat scraper to dry him with), so that he wouldn’t immediately go roll in the dirt and dirty himself up again.

Monica was picking me up at 3 to go out to silver dollar city (local theme park), so I had trying to stick to a rough schedule all day, and actually followed it exactly. I was ready to go when she pulled in. We rode the new roller coaster out there, which takes you upside down six times I think. We checked out all of the foreign food from the World Fest, and mostly sat around talking.

While we were sitting, Monica and I made plans to go ride on Saturday, which I was a little bit nervous about, having not ridden Emmett in around six months. Then, on Friday morning, she called me up and said we should go ride that afternoon. I whined and complained and such because it was rainy out and a little cold, and just not my idea of perfect riding weather. Of course, by 3 it had cleared up, so I was stuck! I met her at her house, where she had her mare waiting in her trailer to take over to Brian’s. We got ready quickly, and then Emmett decided he would play his game of dancing around when I’m trying to get on. I had to spin him in circles every time he moved until he finally stood still, and I finally got on. Success at last! Our trail started by crossing a creek. Now, there was the easy way- crossing on the road/bridge, and the other way- climbing down into the creek and up the bank on the other side. Of course, we had to go the difficult way because Monica’s mare Gypsy had only been ridden three times, and she wanted to get her used to water. Emmett say Gypsy freaking out at the water, and decided that looked like fun, so he used this as an opportunity to spin around and try to head back to the barn. Simultaneous battles of who was in charge began, and a few minutes later, we both emerged victorious on the other side of the water. Everything from that point was smooth sailing. I easily fell into the familiar rhythm of Emm’s walk and trot. I couldn’t believe how easily I sat his trot, as its usually pretty rough. We followed the road a little bit until we came to a big field. Now when I say big field, we’re talking BIG field… probably the size of 10 football fields. It was horse and rider heaven. We rode across it, and came to another gate, but weren’t sure if the land beyond it was still Brian’s or not, so we decided to just turn back for the day. Monica hadn’t wanted to run because she had forgotten her bridle and was just riding with a halter and lead rope, but the sight of this huge field before us with its gentle inclie was just too much for her to resist, so we decided to run up the hill. I was still a bit too nervous about not riding Em in so long that I didn’t get to enjoy it as much as I should have, but it was still great. We crossed back over the creek with no incedent, put Emmett up, and called it a day. We’d only ridden about an hour, but I think that was about right for Em’s first time out in so long. He behaved beautifully other than the mounting and creek episodes, so I was really proud of him.

Saturday I had to work, and it was one of those days at work that never seems to end. I got home, microwaved some leftover lasagna, and was just checking my email when Monica called asking “Well, are you ready?” “Ready for what?” “We’re going riding!!” and so my tired feet pulled on some boots and I was out the door for Act 2. We ran into Brian and his son as we were getting ready to ride, and invited them to come with us. Brian couldn’t’ but his son Kyle who is 13 was all for it. I got Em ready while he got his horse Pepper ready. While I was putting Emmett’s bridle on, I heard him yell “Help!” and then “My horse passed out!” Monica was already on Gypsy, so she rode up to see what was going on. It seems that for some reason, his horse had just decided to lay down while he was putting the saddle on. She was fine though, so we were ready to go a few minutes later! We were just getting ready to leave when Brian’s sister asked me to move my truck up by the barn. I had Kyle hold Emmett while I did, and no sooner was I back on when Monica’s pager told her she had a call from her mom, so she had to run to her truck to call back. We were starting to wonder if we were ever going to get to ride, but of course we were off a few minutes later. The horses gave us no trouble crossing the water this time, and we went across the same field we did last time, but then continued through the gate at the end which led us to the trails. Kyle was a handy guy to have around- he knew where we were going since he lived there, and he got off to open all the gates for us! Woohoo! We chose the trail to the left, and rode for quite a while that direction. We had to turn back around 5:30 because my sister was supposed to be coming that evening, and I needed to get home. As we were coming across the field, Kyle’s horse laid down again! He managed to get off on her way down, so he wasn’t hurt. Strange! As we were running across the field, I decided to see if Emmett remembered voice cues, so I sat deep in the saddle and said “Whoa… whoa…” softly, and he DID! I was unbelievably proud of him. We got in the creek at a different spot, and rode in the water, which was a lot of fun. At one point, there was a pile of gravel about four feet high blocking most of the creek, so I had Emmett go around it. He decided he’d rather be on dry land, and jumped up onto the bank! I got him back down into the water just in time to see Monica’s mare climb up the gravel pile, and slide down the other side. I couldn’t help but break into old cowboy songs, and was really sad that I had to get back to my house and couldn’t keep riding. When we got back to the barn, I untacked Ems while Monica and Kyle continued to ride. I was really proud of Emmett- he had been great all day, and hadn’t given me anywhere near as much trouble getting on, although there is still a lot to work on there. I put him up and went to my truck, only to discover that I had locked my keys in!! My window was down about two inches, but there was no hope of reaching them. I found Brian in the barn to ask if he had a phone I could borrow to call Ford (I loooove that roadside assistance thing in my warranty!) but he thought he could probably get them out. He tried to fish them out with a lunge whip, but was having trouble keeping them on as he pulled them out, so he drove up to his house and came back with a wire hook duct-taped to the end of the whip. A minute of fishing with this brought my keys right out! Woohoo! I thanked him profusely and set off for home. My sister still hadn’t called, and I was exhausted, so I decided I would just go to bed really early. I was just getting in bed about 8 when she called, saying she would be here around midnight and asking if I would still be up. Grr! I told her I’d probably be asleep, but mom would be awake to let her in. I was pretty frustrated that I’d quit riding early so I could get home, and now she wasn’t going to be there until midnight. I fell asleep, and right about 1am, knocking on the back door woke me up. I crawled out of bed to let her in, and then went right back to bed, hoping to fall back asleep (I wanted to be up at 6:30 for work). Well, she decided now would be a grand time to try to hold a conversation with me. I cant be too mad, because she did buy me a box of Star Wars cereal just because it had Ewan McGreggor on the box. Now that’s sisterly love.

I ended up oversleeping till a little after 8 Sunday morning (I was supposed to be at work at 8), but nobody at work ever cares, so life was good. After work, I ran out to see Ems for about an hour, sad that I couldn’t ride.

Anyway, that pretty much brings us to today. I’m going riding at 3:30 with Monica, and am having the dilemma stated in the first paragraph of this entry of being done on time. A lady named Deb who keeps her horse out where Em is is going with us too, so it should be a lot of fun. Its 1:11 right now, and I don’t have anything ready for my meeting, plus I’m not dressed, so I really need to get on the ball. I just need to figure out some kind of quick-change strategy to get me from trail to meeting very, very quickly. I’ll try to write tonight if I’m not totally dead, and let you know how the ride and the meeting went, but don’t count on it. Wish me luck!

(a few hours later)
I cant even begin to tell you what a great day I had today! Unbelievable! I did things I didn’t think I could ever do. I learned I’m a lot stronger and more capable than I think I am. I rode with Monica, Deb, and a lady whose name I have forgotten already (I really need to work on that! Sad thing is I remember her horse’s name). We went on a trail I’ve never been on. It was really rocky with steep hills and a lot of branches to duck under. After riding for quite a while, we came to a huge hill. Massive hill. Mammoth hill. The mother of all hills. Think Mt. Everest in Missouri. Well, you get the point- it was a damn big hill. It was probably at least a half to ¾ mile climb up to the top. Plus, it was rocky, and therefore kind of difficult footing for the horses. It was definitely intimidating, looking up and up and up, balancing weight forward to help the horse climb better, while more and more hill just seemed to loom ahead. By the time we reached the top, Emmett was breathing hard, but oh was it worth it. We rode on forward for a little bit after reaching the top, but then had to get back to the barn because we were all under time constraints. We turned around, and came back to the hill. I took one look and said “You mean we have to go DOWN that thing now!?” If you’re not a horse person, trust me- up is WAY WAY WAY easier than down. I basically had to fight the urge to just close my mind and pray—I pointed Em in the general direction of the bottom, gave him rein, and let him pick his path down- horses always seem to be able to figure out the safest route. I concentrated on little things like not sliding out of the saddle and landing on the sharp rocks, and just talked to him all the way down- “Easy boy, watch your feet! Good boy! You’re such a good boy! Easy now…” Somehow, we made it down. I turned around and looked up, and I just couldn’t believe what I had just done. Awesome. At the bottom of the hill was a herd of cows which Em thought were really, really cool. I think he wanted to herd them (he’s bred to be a cowhorse). Maybe next time I’ll get the courage to see what he will do with them.

We got back to the barn, and all parties involved of both the two and four footed variety were covered in sweat. It was already 5:05, and I had really needed to leave by 4:55, but Emmy really needed hosed off, and he comes before anything. I gave him a quick rinsing down and returned him to his pasture, telling him how proud I was of him, how good he had been, and how much I loved him (aww!). Then I jumped in my truck, praying the whole way that I would make it to Hollister in time. I was supposed to meet my models for the evening at a gas station at 5:30, and they would follow me to the meeting. The problem, of course, was that I was wearing a t-shirt, jeans, muddy boots, and sweat when I needed to be wearing a skirt, pantyhose, and makeup. I got to the gas station at exactly 5:30 (don’t ask me how!) ran into their bathroom and did a super quick change, and then went out to the parking lot to wait for my models. They arrived at 5:58, and therefore I was late for a meeting for the first time ever. However, I think they’re good recruit prospects, and will all probably order stuff, so its worth it.

Wow, long entry. I really need to make an effort to get words onto paper (computer) before I lose the moment. Its hard for me to tell you how great all these rides really were since I’ve slept since then, and I have so much to write about. We’re planning on writing tomorrow, which I’m looking forward to, and then we have the Debut & Dance on Friday, which I’m looking forward to bigtime. I never told you my costume! I’m going to be Marilyn Monroe! I really need to write about the costume shops and such, but I’m totally worn out now, and this entry is already five pages long, so I’ll get back to that. Its so nice to have a life again!

posted by Crystal 11:12 PM

Tuesday, April 23, 2002

Today was spent running around springfield with Monica, trying on costumes, which I'll write more about tomorrow night. Right now, I'm tired, and the words just arent coming. So, tomorrow.
posted by Crystal 11:41 PM

Monday, April 22, 2002

I had planned on writing an entry last night but I ended up, well, not. I’ve decided its time to just break down and buy myself a domain. Its mostly because I’m sick of having to get Rich to upload pictures for me so I can put them on here, because im out of space on AOL and geocities is the devil. Plus, you know, I want my own nifty address, and I’m really considering stopping the use of Blogger, and just setting up a separate page for each entry, so I can have niftier archives and such. So, if those of you who are web-smart could tell be about what hosting service you use, how much it is, what it offers, etc. I would be eternally grateful. I may even name a fish after you. Oooh, that reminds me that its Monday, and therefore new fish day at wal-mart! I really need to go before my meeting and see what they have! Neat.

So far I’m really loving my redesign, its so refreshing to have something new. My goal for today is to learn how to add a scroll bar to that top right box so I can add more info there without it running down into my main text box. Anyone know how to do that and wanna share?

I finally decided a few days ago that I was tired of waiting, I was ready to just drop everything and paint my bathroom (I’ve been watching way too much Trading Spaces!) I cleaned everything off the counters, piled it all in the cabinets or bathtubs, and was all set to go. Of course, as soon as I stepped out the door on my way to wal-mart for painting supplies, it started raining hard. So hard I couldn’t see fifteen feet in front of me as I drove, and so I turned around and came home, sad to have to put it off until the next day.

Right after work on Saturday, I went up and surveyed the paint color choices. My curtains and towels are pink, so I had been planning on light pink all along. I finally chose a color called Apple Blossom, which was pink enough to not look white, but not so pink it was nauseating. I liked it, and had the guy mix me a gallon (I was convinced I could get by on half a gallon, but everyone I talked to said I would need a gallon, so I gave in) In the mean time, I looked over the little packages of painting supplies, and ended up getting a roller with sponge-rollery thingeys, some of those little foam brush things, some tape to tape off the edges, and my FAVORITE, the edge painter. Have you ever used one of those? SO much fun. Now, you must keep in mind that my painting experience is limited to a whole lot of sets for plays in high school, and my friend Shelly’s livingroom and bedroom either last summer or the summer before (they all fade together), so I had some idea of what I was doing, but not a whole lot. I loaded everything into my truck (I was stupid enough to have not gotten a shopping cart, so I was carrying a gallon of paint in one hand, and trying to balance a tray, roller, sponge thingeys, edger, tape and coat hangers in the other hand all the way to the register). When I got home, I searched my kitchen for trash bags, having decided to just use a few of those instead of buying a drop cloth, but couldn’t find any, so I had dad go find one for me in his shed while I set to work taping off the room. When the time came, I opened my paint can and poured some into the tray. I noticed it looked a little more… purpley than it was supposed to, but I figured it would change to the right color when it dried. I started painting, having a grand old time, and making up songs as I went, such as “Martha Stewart Aint Got Nothin On Me”. Two hours and a few paint fume induced hallucinations later, I was finished! It was grand! It was beautiful! It was shiny! It was… purple!!! I really wish my little webcam could reach to my bathroom so I could show you the difference in the color I selected and the final color. Technically, the final color almost matches Party Buddha, though, so here is a picture of the difference. (Where would I be without Party Buddha?)

Okay, Party Buddha looks way darker purple than he is there. I suppose I could show you the paint tray.

That’s a bit more accurate. Have I mentioned I REALLY need a digital camera?! I am really considering changing the DVD Player fund to the Digital Camera fund. I really want one by simucon (43 days, btw!) and so that’s probably the direction I’ll go. Speaking of Simucon, I was just thinking yesterday afternoon that I really wanted some roommates, as in my opinion, that’s half of the experience. Well, as if on cue, this girl named Brannigan tells me that her roommate isn’t going anymore, and she cant afford the room by herself, so she probably cant go now. I tell her we can just share a room since I’m alone now too, and voila! Instant roommate! Well, about three hours later, Remi tells me that HER roommates cant go now, and so now I may have three roommates! I adore Remi because she is pretty much my age, and we were roommates last year, so I feel like I owe her one. I am just hoping that Branna is ok with having Remi there too. And of course we’ll have Kelly there the first night too, so it will be quite the fun room! Remi is looking into getting us a sign to put on the door that says Sweetheart’s Bungalow (Modus joke..). I am just waiting for Bran to come online so I can ask her about Remi. In short, I’m way excited about Simucon.

Oh, as I was saying before I got way off on the simu tangent, my bathroom is purple, not pink. But I dig it, so now I’m gonna get some new towels and make a new curtain, and I’ll be all set. I forgot to show you the most important picture! This is the ugly wallpaper I had before I painted:

So, pretty lilac color is quite an improvement. As I predicted, it only took half a gallon, and so I have half left, and mom wants me to do her bathroom next. Yay, more painting!

I spent my weekend at work as usual. I found out we’re opening up a new resort they just bought on the lake, and we will need people out there too, so I will probably be working full time for a few weeks, which is okay with me, because I could really use the extra money right now.

Sunday morning, I was out tossing a few cookies off the balcony to the squirrels as usual, but this one squirrel who we call the Crab, Crabby, or Crab-ass, was sitting there in the trees chattering at me the whole time like he was pissed off at me! I couldn’t stop laughing, so I went in to tell Cathy about him, and she handed me a peanut butter cookie, saying I should throw it at him to shut him up. I took it out and aimed in his general direction, with no intent of actually hitting him, I just wanted to hit the tree below him to make him shut up and stop yelling at me to give him cookies. Well, I tossed the cookie at the tree Frisbee style, and instead of hitting the tree, I hit the little guy and almost knocked him off the limb! Well, he looked at me with utter shock for a second, and then started chattering even more! I felt pretty bad that I had actually hit him, but man it was funny. I could never have that kind of aim again even if I tried.

Moving on from unintentional squirrel abuse, I got NEW SHOES yesterday! I saw these shoes about a week ago, and I have been dreaming about them ever since. Finally at work, I decided that I simply must have them, and went up right after work to get them. Look! Look how cute!

I’m trying to figure out a way to wear them to my meeting tonight so I can show them off. I am way too excited about these shoes. I also got some really nifty orange Hawaiian print pajama pants, but as much as I love them, the orange just doesn’t look good on me, so I’m going to go exchange them for the blue or green ones. I wish I could find this fabric somewhere though, because I would make pillows out of it for my new tropical room I’ll have once I, you know, get started on it.

Last night we had a blackjack tournament on Modus, which was quite fun even though I didn’t even come close to winning. I love when we have stuff where a bunch of us get together, since we do that so rarely these days. I had more fun flirting with the dealer than gambling though.

Tonight was MK meeting as usual, and it went pretty well. I built my outfit around my new shoes just so that I could wear them, so that was all kinds of fun!

I think that pretty much sums up everything that’s been going on! I wish I had some interesting way to close this, but I’m all out, so adios!

posted by Crystal 10:27 PM

Friday, April 19, 2002

To Do Tomorrow:
Work 8-4
Paint bathroom
Build nifty shelf in bedroom (I wanna be Amy Wynn when I grow up)
Sell 4 lipsticks
Purchase paint, painting supplies, and shelf hardware
(not necessarily in that order)
posted by Crystal 8:04 PM

And believe it or not, on time for once, the Friday Five!

1. What's your favorite TV show and why? Well, you must keep in mind that the evil people who control my satelite make it impossible for me to get local channels, so I'm very much a satellite kinda girl. I love my Trading Spaces, Emergency Vets, Anything on the Travel Channel, RW/RR challenge and Real World on MTV, yada yada ya

2. Who is your favorite television star? Ooh, thats tough. I have crushes on the carpenters and half the designers from Trading Spaces- do they count? And Timmy on RW/RR Challenge

3. What was your favorite TV show as a child? Punky Brewster, She-Rah, Rainbow Brite...

4. What show do you think should have been cancelled by now? You know, I have no idea. I dont watch TV enough to develop much hate for shows.

5. What new show do you hope escapes the axe this season? See, this is where we go back to that whole I dont get the regular channels stuff. No idea.
posted by Crystal 2:12 PM

Well, there are a few tiny glitches left, but all in all I am happy with the redesign. Things that happened as accidents, like all of the text of the posts being bold and centered, I'm actually ending up liking. I dont know if I will keep it like that, but its a nice change. I do want the text in the top right box to be left-aligned, but cant figure out how to do that just yet. I love my chameleon. I love my sunflowers. This design makes me happy, and not just because I am SICK of staring at the palm trees. Kelly tells me that my design is kinda screwy on her crazy resolution, so y'all need to tell me how it looks on yours! Thats what the comments are for, kids.
posted by Crystal 12:13 AM

Thursday, April 18, 2002

Ugh, working out technical problems..
posted by Crystal 9:18 PM

Oh my, she redesigned!!
posted by Crystal 9:06 PM

Wednesday, April 17, 2002

Today was one of those days when I felt particularly alive. I overslept as usual, but managed to shower and get to work with only slightly damp hair by 8:30, which is pretty impressive in my book. Work went pretty well, we finally got our tv working, so I flipped through the channels when I got there, and was thrilled to see that they had Paige & Doug from Trading Spaces on CNN! They introduced them as “This is Paige Davis, the host, and Doug (forgot his last name) the designer.” And they both kind of laughed and Paige said something like “Doug wishes he were the designer, actually he is one of six”. I was amused. They showed the room Doug did that made the woman cry, it was great. As if that weren’t a great enough way to start the day, Kelly and Sharon Osbourne were then on Live, but people started coming before they were off, so I didn’t get to watch all of it. Still, Trading Spaces and the Osbournes both in one morning? Works for me!

On my lunch break, I grabbed my cream cheese from the fridge, and drove to a parking lot that I like going to because its nice and quiet, and there are trees and birds and such. I parked and rolled my windows down, and sat reading for 45 minutes while I ate some of my bagel. I read this fantastic chapter in Little Altars Everywhere about their summer house, and it made me decide that I absolutely must have a summer house just like it, with the checkered plastic table cloths, bunk beds, and a chaise lounge for me to read on. I need to start up a book page similar to Maggie’s, and put an excerpt of this chapter there, because I love it. Love it love it. I cant wait for the “Divine Secrets of the Ya Ya Sisterhood” movie. Rebecca Wells (author of both) is awesome.

I went back to work when the heat became unbearable, and managed to get a little more reading done in between tours, and finally left about 2:30. I adore going home like that knowing I’m on the clock until four. The only sour note of the day was when I was sitting out on the back deck daydreaming about my cool summer house, watching the squirrels (Remind me to tell you about them!) and admiring the dogwood trees, which had just bloomed. I was sitting peacefully when the construction chick had the audacity to come out and tell me that I couldn’t have the back door open while the air was on. Okay, the front door is open constantly all day, and the sales people leave the back door open all the time: me sitting out there for ten minutes is not the end of the world, and certainly not worth bitching me out for. She used to be a pretty cool chick, but it seems like at some point she started disliking me. Evil wench. Anyway, I left about 2:30, and on the drive home I took my hair out of its braids and let it flow free in the wind on the way home as I drove with the air conditioning on, the windows down, and the radio blaring.

At home, I was standing by the kitchen window, and caught sight of the thermometer out on a tree in the front yard: 100 degrees. 100 degrees and our air conditioning still isn’t working- I’m worried my fish are going to fry in their own tanks. I stood there and wished SO much for a swimming pool in my yard, where I could spend hot summer afternoons. They used to have pretty nice ones at wal-mart that were about 4 ft deep and 12 feet wide for around $250, with filter and everything, so maybe I should save up and get one of those. Of course, by the time I got that money, it would be January…

I am in love. I am in love with the Venus Razor. I read a bunch about it over on The Usual Suspects boards, and decided I would give it a try. Its not like me to spend $6 on a razor, I’m a disposable kinda girl, but oh man. Baby, this feels so good I’m never going back! My legs are smoother than they have been since I was BORN. I keep sitting here rubbing them because they feel soooo good! I just sat there in the bathtub, staring at this razor as I shaved, as if that would somehow unlock all its secrets. Basically, it ROCKS.

My bird obviously has no problem with self confidence. I just walked in on him saying “I’m a pretty boy! Pretty pretty pretty boy!”

I decided today that I simply must go rent Cruel Intentions and Breakfast at Tiffany’s. I decided to go to the video store in Hollister, because they have a lot of movies that the one in Branson doesn’t, so I figured I’d do the 7 movies for 7 days for 7 dollars thing over there. Can you believe that they had neither Cruel Intentions NOR Breakfast at Tiffany’s!? So, I drove back to the local video place, and Cruel Intentions was out, but Breakfast at Tiffany’s was in, so I just got it. Ah, how I adore this movie.

It is almost midnight, my window is open for cold airness, and it is still about a gazillion degrees in here. AOL says it is 73 outside, but it is at least 85 in my bedroom. Please, please let the air conditioning people come tomorrow. Please.

posted by Crystal 11:52 PM

Monday, April 15, 2002

It has been far too long since I have mentioned my quote page. I was searching it today for some good quotes to include in the cards I'm sending out for postcardx, and fell in love with it all over again. In a way it serves as my pre-blogger journal, because I can easily remember what was going on in my life by the quotes I posted at that time.

~No! Not at all.... just because I'm the legal guardian of a pregant, quadripalegic, loaf of bread means nothing! (Erin)

~I dont wanna invade his privacy- I just wanna sleep with him! (me)

~"Hi my name is Raul the sexy islander." (From one of the great literary works of art Amanda and I wrote)

~Faster than a speeding Buddah! (Bren)

~Does just walking through it make you want to kill yourself? Well, then, its a high school!~(Mystery science theater)

~I've gotten worse burns milking a cow! (Brandy)

~Kelley, You've killed their God! (pause) Kelley, you've just killed their God again! (pause) Their God is back! Kelley, I'm beginning to think these flys are polytheistic!!" (Kelly and I set out to get rid of the Fly Gods, aka huge horseflies attacking her horse)

~I make all of my trees happy trees. I don't like unhappy trees because one bit me when I was a child! (Bob Ross-yes, he actually SAID that!)

posted by Crystal 9:40 PM

Sunday, April 14, 2002

I am a clutz. If you remember, I was supposed to get off work early today and go ride. I had kind of been debating it all day because the weather was kind of icky, my back hurt a lot, I was still sore from riding a few days ago, and I was having allergy issues and feeling generally icky. I decided to go anyway, and was on my way out to my truck after leaving work, and stepped weird on the curb, and twisted my ankle. I ignored it and started driving, but a minute later I noticed it hurt, so I went back to work to see how it would be in about 15 minutes. Well, it was still hurting, so I decided to just give in and stay at work. They really needed me anyway, since it was a really busy day. I was mad at myself for yet another injury.

Yes, I can lack grace in my day to day life, thats why I want to study dressage. Dressage is a very precice, graceful sort of riding. I found this picture that can give you a general idea, if you have no idea what its like. Its a definite challenge for me though.

I yelled at the TV tonight when the rain knocked out my satellite reception and screwed up my Trading Spaces. Addicted? Nah. I just have a crush on the carpenters. And I want to keep Vern.

I had planned to write a lot more tonight, but I am really sleepy, and need to get up extra early tomorrow so that I can wash my hair before work, so now I sleep!
posted by Crystal 12:02 AM

Saturday, April 13, 2002

As usual, my day late Friday Five

1. What is your favorite restaurant and why? Wow, that's a toughie! Locally, I love the Olive Garden, Applebees, and this awesome Mexican restaurant downtown called Pepper Bellies. If I can count all the Disney restaurants I love though, then there's Le Cellier, Whispering Canyon Cafe, Rainforest Cafe, and a bunch more :)

2. What fast food restaurant are you partial to? Subway, Taco Bell, KFC

3. What are your standards and rules for tipping? Depends on how much money I have at the time, how the service was, and how attractive the waiter is!

4. Do you usually order an appetizer and/or dessert? I dont eat much, so usually if I'm ordering either of those, its because thats all I'm eating.

5. What do you usually order to drink at a restaurant? I'm a water drinking gal.
posted by Crystal 11:30 PM

Thursday, April 11, 2002

I am so, so very mad at my computer. I typed up a big long post on AOL, was JUST copying it to paste into blogger, and my computer died. I lost it all. I don’t even remember what all I said, but I’m going to try. Its never the same the second time around, though.

I had a great ride today, exactly what I was needing. The horse shoer was coming at 1:30, so we only had about two hours to ride, but seeing I haven’t ridden in months, it was probably better that way. As I predicted, I’m now a little sore, and a little scratched up, but much happier. I may have mentioned how its impossible to come out of one of Susie’s Trail Rides of Death with no injuries, and today was no exception. We rode across the road from her house, and I stopped right at the beginning of the trail to readjust my right stirrup, because it was one hole too high, and starting to hurt my leg. I couldn’t adjust it while I was still on the horse, so I hopped off to fix it. However, on my way down, I managed to scrape my stomach against something on the saddle. I didn’t know it at the time, but I looked at it when I got back to the barn, and I have two icky looking scratches about two inches long on my stomach! Ow!

I rode a sweet grey mare named Thumper, who I didn’t get along with last time I rode, but adored this time. We rode for about two hours, up hills, across fields, through the creek. The creek was so high from all of the recent rain that my boots got wet. We came to a long slightly uphill stretch with good footing, so we decided to run. I can’t even begin to tell you how good that felt. A canter really is the cure to any evil, as they say. I tensed up at first, seeing its been so long since I’ve been on a horse, but was estatic to feel my body relax and automatically fall into the rocking rhythm of the gait as we flew past the trees. I yelled to Susie who was ahead of me, “This feels SO good!” There’s nothing I love more than flying across the ground on the back of a horse on a warm day. It wasn’t just the run that felt good though, it was realizing that everything that riding instructors yelled at me for so many years is natural now, that my body understands that this is what its made to do. I sit with heels down, toes in at the right angle, shoulders back.. and don’t even have to think about it. But I do it when I’m not riding too. When I drive, I click to my truck, shift my weight back onto my butt when I apply the brakes, just as if I were halting a horse. When I go around a tight corner, my weight shifts just like if I were going around a barrel. Its hard to explain how much of me it is. This all made a lot more sense the first time I wrote it, I promise.

I just watched a movie about Van Gogh coming back to life, called Starry Night. The script and the acting sucked, but it was still interesting if you’re a big van gogh fan.
I found out via AOL today that they are making a movie of The Divine Secrets of theYa Ya Sisterhood, which makes me very happy, since the whole time I was reading it, I kept thinking what a good movie it would make. I would not have cast Sandra Bullock as Sidda, though.

So, that’s the general gist of my entry from earlier, which I will sulk over losing for a few hours. Evil computer.

posted by Crystal 9:11 PM

I am having one of those mornings where I just can’t quite get going, probably because I overslept. I’m only half dressed, and have quite a bit to get done before I go ride, such as stopping by work to drop off some samples for someone, but I just want to sit in my chair and read online journals and such. I cant even decide what shirt to wear riding, its like my thought process is still trying to catch another half hour of sleep. I’ll wake up once I’m on a horse though, I have a feeling my body will spring to life with that recollection of “Oh yes! This! This is what I do!”. My body knows its purpose in life is to ride, even though my brain seems to think that sleep is more important. I cant wait to get out there and groom Thumper (little grey mare I’m riding) before I ride- I love love love grooming. And Ms. Thumper is all muddy, so I have my work cut out for me. I will have her looking like she is ready to enter the ring at the Olympics in no time flat, even though we’re just going out trail riding. I am going to be SORE tonight. I haven’t used those muscles that riding uses in so long, and Susie’s trail rides of Death usually go on for hours and hours. I will come back tired and sore and probably a bit scratched up (Humm, no trail? We can make one here!), but I will be feeling so refreshed, and so.. good!

My dear female fish Ms. Audrey died last night, and I have absolutely no idea why. Maybe the pressure of living in the same house as seven males who all wanted her was just too much. Its kind of a mystery, but it makes me sad- she was a neat fish. I don’t think I will get another female for a while, because I’m obviously too whimpy to breed them just yet, and if I did breed, what on earth would I do with all those baby fish? The seven I have have taken over my bedroom, what would I do with 50 more!? So, I’ll get around to breeding eventually, but for the time being, its just me and the boys.

And I think I’m finally awake, so I’m gonna go search for my grey t-shirt with my horse’s name on it, since that seems like a good shirt to ride in today. I have jeans on, and know where my boots are, so at least there’s a start. Socks have to be around here somewhere, right?

And will someone leave me a comment just for the hell of it, because I’m not sure how well my comment system is working these days.

posted by Crystal 9:46 AM

Wednesday, April 10, 2002

I have horse hair all over my shirt, and mud all over my hands, and I am very happy about this. I am unhappy about the fact that I have been too tired to write lately. I’m this close to falling asleep, but I’m going to give it a fair try anyway.

I ended up working this morning, from 8-2, did some shopping on my lunch break and ended up with 3 new shirts I shouldn’t have bought since I’ve put $1000 on that credit card in the last month, and a nifty new razor. I have got to stop this shopping when I have no money stuff. Really.

While I was at work, my friend Susie called to tell me her mare had had its foal, so I should come out to check it out. I was way excited about this, since it was about 80 degrees out today, and I was dying for an excuse to be outside. I really wanted to go over straight from work, but for some reason my muck boots weren’t in the back of my truck where they belong, and I was wearing white tennis shoes. New white shoes plus muddy paddocks do not work. So, I had to run home and change into my riding boots, and then drive about a half hour to her house. It’s a really nice, peaceful drive, and its on little two-lane country roads where you go 60 miles an hour around hairpin curves, and then screech to a halt to avoid the chicken in the road. I made it out there and had all sorts of fun playing with the new baby- he was born Sunday, so he’s still the littlest thing, but he’s just starting to get interested in the world around him, and a tiny bit more independent from Mom. Then Susie needed to breed a mare that had been left at her place for breeding to her new stallion Rio. The mare, however, had just foaled 9 days ago, so she couldn’t be too far away from her baby yet without freaking out. My job was to hold the foal near the fence so she could see it while she was breeding and not freak out. Sounds easy, right? The problem was that the foal, being 9 days old, was not halter broke yet, and wasn’t too excited about being around us humans to begin with. With a lot of fighting on all accounts (ours, the mare’s, and the foals!) we finally made it out to the roundpen, which was by far the hardest part. The foal would suddenly freak out about this strange device on its head (the halter) and start running backwards, which would upset the mom, who would literally pull whoever was leading her along with her back to her baby. We finally got them in the ring, and I worked on calming the foal down and convincing her we weren’t all out to eat her while the stallion was brought out. It was his first time breeding, so he was a very, very, very excited horse. He got on (Do you really want to know all of this?) and was really rather good except an incedent in the very beginning when he kicked her quite a bit trying to get a good hold on her. I swear, if only I had a picture of the expression on his face when things were finally going good for him, it was the funniest thing, sort of a “At LAST! Man, this rocks!” sort of expression. The whole thing was over very quickly, and getting the mare and foal back into the barn was way easier than getting them out, and Rio paraded around the roundpen for about 3253 hours with his head held high, as if to say “I’m the MAN!”

We decided to go ride tomorrow morning, so I’m very excited about that, seeing that I haven’t ridden in ages and I really need to. Tomorrow night I have a Mary Kay thing, so I’m hoping I can squeeze in a shower in between.

You know, it’s a really good thing that I got the movies for 7 days. Last night I was too sick to watch any, today I didn’t get home till 8 and now its almost 10, so I don’t have time to watch one before I sleep. Tomorrow I’m riding in the morning, and have a MK thing in the evening, so its pretty much shot too.

I know I jotted down some notes of things I wanted to write about today, but I just don’t have the energy to get them out and do so right now. I will add in that while browsing through BN yesterday, I came across “The Idiot’s Guide To Self Esteem”. Am I the only one who finds this ironic?

It feels so good to finally be really busy again. I’d take over not having time to write over having way too much time any day, since it’s the good kind of busy that isn’t composed of stuff I don’t want to do. Off to sleep now.

posted by Crystal 11:04 PM

I wrote that last entry last night, I was just in too much pain to post it- major head/back ache. I have things to tell you, but seeing that I'm supposed to be at work in 5 minutes and I dont even have makeup on yet...
posted by Crystal 7:48 AM

I would like to start this off by saying I am failing miserably at the April Hour A Day Dare.

I'm trying to figure out what I want to do tonight. I kinda wanna sit around and do nothing. I kinda wanna read. I kinda wanna go down to the video store and get a movie. I kinda wanna play the Sims. I kinda wish I could stop eating these damn hershey's kisses.

I drove to springfield this morning to get my hair done, at last! I was due to have it re-done back in January, if that tells you how bad it was. I am so, so happy to have it done. Afterwards I went to the mall, and ended up buying a tank top I really needed for just $10 at Abercrombie. Thats all I bought *all* day. This has nothing to do with the fact that the only credit cards that arent maxxed out are abercrombie and sears, really. Nor that I only had $20 cash on me, $10 of which needed to go to gas and food. I think I freaked out the girl working at the art store because spent ages flipping through the prints, wishing I had enough money to buy about fifty different ones.

Last night I stumbled over something on the floor of my bedroom and took a huge chunk out of my toe.
Am I the only one thinking that Mc Donalds is a little off using that Spice Girls song in their chicken strips ad? Four years too late man, four years too late.
posted by Crystal 7:47 AM

Sunday, April 07, 2002

Coolest quote from my meeting last Monday: "Nobody would have blamed Columbus for giving up after 65 days of sailing without reaching land, but nobody would have remembered him, either."
posted by Crystal 9:19 PM

I feel so restless today. Its one of those cold rainy evenings, where all I would normally want to do is curl up in bed and read, especially since I got "Little Altars Everywhere" in the mail yesterday, and I cant wait to read more of it. For some reason though, I'm restless and keep bouncing between things, thinking I'll stumble upon what I'm looking for. I come online, decide I'd rather be reading so I lay down to read, decide I'd rather watch TV so I do that, decide I'd rather be online, and the cycle continues. I've been doing this continuously for about four hours now. I know where I really want to be. I want to be curled up on that leather sofa by the fireplace in the little sitting area on the fourth floor of the Wilderness Lodge. I'd be stretched out on the sofa, sitting so that if I glance up from my book, that big busy lobby is right before me, below me, above me, around me. I want to be there in my own quiet little corner of paradise, while families rush by just below off to this lunch reservation or that park, or coming back to their rooms tired and sunburned and worn out in the best way possible. I want to be laying there with a good book, and a brownie from the fast food place, just letting all of my senses soak up every last bit of the music, the voices, the warmth of the fire, the light filtering in through the small square windows behind me, or the huge window overlooking bay lake that lies across the lobby. I want my feet to be tired and my spirit refreshed, instead of the other way around which tends to be the case these days.

I am still yet to decide if the planning or the reminicing is the best part, although its hard to distinguish because they tend to be one in the same. Believe it or not, actually being on vacation is not a contender for the "best part". Usually at the time I dont really let it all soak in- I'm so overstimulated that it takes far more to catch my eye than usual, but some back corner of my brain stores away the little things for later, such as when I'm alone at work on a rainy Sunday morning, and I recall all of those tiny details, the sights and sounds and smells that just flew by me before are now so vivid, and I want to be there to live them so much. I feel like my mind is a video camera that is constantly taping the experience while I'm living it, and then at the slightest provocation, it plays back the tape, and all the details I overlooked at the time are right ther. I have to wonder though, how many I am just filling in. Were the seats in that theater really red, for example, or is my brain just completing the faded picture?

I'm planning for a really good, long trip in November now. Six months is a long time, but I'm as yet undecided as to how good that is for planning. Its usually how long I spend planning a trip, so its probably just about perfect. I know, however, that on the night before, I will be kicking myself for not planning more, and feeling that there are so many loose ends and not enough time. Maybe I can actually avoid that this time. Maybe I dont want to. Maybe I dont know much afterall.

I know the majority of you can't relate to how obsessive I am about planning Disney trips, I think you have to be one of the obsessed people to understand the obsession. That's why I had so much fun with Nate & the Cru-crew in December- I was surrounded by people that were as crazy about what we were doing as I was, for once I didn't have to be the walking guide book because we all were. If I were to say "Hey, lets have lunch at Boma", I wouldn't have to explain, and I'd get their honest opinions immediatly. But more than anything, I think I had so much fun because of the enthusiasm. They were all just as excited about the little things as I was. We would have shown as much enthusiasm for finding $500 laying on the sidewalk as we did because we got the purple monorail (our favorite!) (And okay, maybe not *quite* as much, because $500 can buy a hell of a lot of Kungalooshes..) I really need to finish my trip report soon, and Nate needs to finish his, and I need to upload all my pix and write captions and such... why do we do it all? I think its half to share all the fun we had with others, maybe a quiet attempt to suck them into our little world so they can have as much fun as we do, or maybe its just organizing the memories. Getting to relive them as we put them down in words. And then reliving again as we read the other's perception of things. Its hard to explain.
posted by Crystal 9:18 PM

I dont like this lack of time to myself. Yesterday I got home around 5 from work, and just crashed on my bed until about 7:30 where I watched some TV and ate until I was capable of moving again, then I came online. I was only here about 15 minutes though before I was way too tired to stay awake anymore, so I went to bed. I need my time online to relax and such! I am going to be late today- I set my clock for 6:30, but didn't get up till about 7:40. I'd rather be a little late than not have time to eat and sit at the computer for a few minutes. I've found it doesnt really matter what I *do* at the computer, but I need my time online to recharge.

Today should be quicker, since I'm working with Lou, and well, Lou is Lou. Sundays are always less busy than Saturday, anyway. Keep your fingers crossed for me!
posted by Crystal 7:55 AM

Saturday, April 06, 2002

sleepy sleepy sleepy sleepy sleepy sleepy sleepy
posted by Crystal 7:46 PM

Okay, I very obviously got a bit spoiled not working my regular job since Feb. I’m sitting here throwing myself a big pity party because I have to work the next two days. I was thinking if I got up at 6:30, I’d have plenty of time to myself before having to be there at 8, but its just not enough time. There’s this sense of just knowing that I have to leave here in like 45 minutes that ruins the relaxing time.

While I was out yesterday, I stopped in the Disney store, and it made me very, very sad because it reminded me a lot of a resort gift shop, or one of the shops in one of the parks, and I could just imagine walking out the doors and hopping on the monorail. I’ve been missing WDW a lot lately, probably because its almost May, and I’ve gotten in the habit of going in May. I’m really sad that I cant go this May, but I’m hoping for a really good November trip, so maybe that will make up for it. Inspired by the 365 Days ago thing on Mo’s journal, I read back to a year ago yesterday, and I would just love to be where I was then. I had just signed up to be a Mary Kay consultant with Amanda, I was leaving for Disney world the end of April, then I had Simucon the 1st week of June, and Equitana the 2nd week. I still have Simucon in june, and hopefully Equitana too, but its just not the same as having all of that. Yeah, I guess I’m just being a big baby about no Disney. My kingdom for some Tonga Toast! My annual pass runs out the end of this month, and I’m really itching to go use it one more time, but seeing that I’m 2 months behind on my truck payments, I don’t think that’s going to be happening.

Its 7:22. I have to be there at 8. I’m not dressed, no makeup. I have combed my hair and done my whole face routine. What I really want to do is hop in bed and read for a few hours, and then go have lunch at this great Mexican place downtown. I guess that I could technically do that, but the end results wouldn’t be pretty. Its nice feeling like I have a choice though, that always makes doing the non-desirable stuff like selling your soul to the company for 8 hours for something like $50. The sad part (I am WHINING today!!!) is that things are actually busy now, so instead of taking my book up to the third floor and reading in the sunshine, I have to actually bake cookies all day. I am not so excited about this. I am pretty into the fact that I will probably go grab a bagel from St. Louis bread company for lunch, as I haven’t had one in ages.

posted by Crystal 7:50 AM

Friday, April 05, 2002

Take a moment to think about something. This came to mind while I was washing my face this morning. How different would your life be if there were no internet? Okay, now uncurl from the fetal position, and follow me here. First, how many people would you have never met? I was thinking about my boyfriend, and my first thought was that if I hadnt met him online, I would have run into Simucon, but obviously if there were no internet, there would be no Simu, and therefore no Simucon. Hummm..
If there were no internet, I would not have a Veggie Tales song stuck in my head, because Erin introduced me to veggie tales, and guess where I met her? I would have NEVER gone to WDW alone in December, because I wouldn't have known Katie, Rich, Kelly, Katt, Nate, the DIS- group or the Passporter group. I would have also had a very limited knowledge of WDW in general, because 90% of what I know I learned online. Oh, and my first trip there? Would have just been me and mom, because I met Amanda online. Once your mind gets going on how much the internet has influenced your life, you start to wonder just what would be left without it. I may have never worked at Dixie, because I went there with Katie, who I knew from online, when I decided I wanted to apply.

My world would be so small.
posted by Crystal 1:13 PM

1. What are the first things that you do in the morning to start your day? I usually lay in bed for a few minutes and watch something random on TV, then get up and stretch for a few minutes, and then check my email. Once I'm halfway conscious, I go in to wash my face, then I go back to the computer to check up on people's journals. Eventually I go back in to put makeup on and get dressed. Then I sit down with my list of things to do for that day and figure out where I'm going to start.

2. What are the last things that you do at night before going to bed? Usually the last things I do are feed my fish, and then write out my 6 most important things to do for the next day

3. What daily routine have you recently added to your day? Well, I just started waking up this early a few weeks ago, so its all pretty new.

4. What routine do you wish you get rid of? Humm, not sure, there isnt anything I dread doing all that much.

5. What's the one thing that makes you feel like something is missing if you don't do it some point within your day? Probably just getting online. If I'm not on at least some point during the day, I feel weird. I honestly dont remember the last time that I was at home with my computer working that I didn't get on at least once. Maybe I need to do that sometime soon.
posted by Crystal 10:12 AM

Thursday, April 04, 2002

I am getting desperate in my search for a redesign. I came up with this, but it is severely lacking. I'd give anything to have a design as cool as this one. Perhaps someday I will get some talent for this design stuff.

Looking at the sky through the trees in my back yard, it looks exactly like Starry Night- a swirl of blues and yellows and blacks. It is beautiful.

I learned today that the majority of people in Hong Kong live in apartments that average 200 square feet, for your average family of 2 adults and 2 children. Isnt that insane? When I get a place of my own, I need at least a good 600 feet just for myself, I cant imagine sharing just 200 with three other people. How do they not kill each other?

The phone has rung about a million times in the past hour, but nobody answers it- dad doesn't because he doesn't hear it, and I don't because of indifference. I'm not much of a phone girl, and I avoid answering it unless I know for sure that whoever is calling is someone I want to talk to.

I put Audrey and Sugar Daddy today, and he was really pretty nice, but when he started beating her up, I just couldn't take it and had to take her out. (The male & female betta fight to show each other that they are both strong enoug to take care of babies, but it made me sad!) Now she is just hanging out in her little tank (Heh, actually its his, I felt bad, I tell ya.. he is in the jar) She is hiding under the little plant I put in there, she's been under there on and off.

I'm already screwing up on the April Hour a Day Dare, as I've only written about 10 minutes today, but I'm really really sleepy, so I shall write 2 hours tomorrow.
posted by Crystal 8:52 PM

This made me happy.

You’re Michelle Branch! You’re the ‘girl nextdoor’ type of gal. You’ve got a down-to-earth feel about you, and you’re not afraid to be original. You’re still trying to find yourplace in life, but that doesn’t mean you’re not enjoying the trip. Rich and famous? Sure! But you’re not gonna let that go to your head. ;D

What Kind of Pop Princess Are You? Quiz by Jonah

posted by Crystal 6:39 PM

Wednesday, April 03, 2002

Tonight I found myself stretched out on my bed watching Friends and eating a cookie I picked up at work today while glancing through my book on Southeast Asia. The pictures in the beginning are absolutely beautiful, and make me really want to go there. The book reminded me of a set of chopsticks I had purchased in the Japan pavilion in Epcot back in December while I was there with Nate, and I got a major urge to cook some rice and use them, so I did. I’m trying to overcome the habit of buying things that I just allow to sit around and look pretty instead of using them, and using the chopsticks was a lot of fun, even though they are really too pretty to use, and I have no idea how to use them. My rice was pretty horrible- I severly either over or undercooked it. It was far from being Japanese either- it was Spanish rice, but it was the thought that mattered, you know.

After eating what I could of the rice, I was still absolutely starving and searched my kitchen for something I couldn’t screw up, ending up with a can of cheese tortellini. I do so much better with things like this that don’t require adding water. I decided to just use the pot that I had started to cook my rice in earlier before discovering that it didn’t have a matching lid. As I was rinsing the rice that had decided to stick around out, he pan emitted an otherworldly music as I swirled the water around inside with my fingertip, a sound which made me think of an echo in a metallic cavern, and for that moment, I was once again a toddler deriving great joy from beating on pots and pans with a spoon, rockstar-style, so intrigued to be making this music with my own hands.

I completed the meal with a chunk of French bread from a baguette I found sitting atop the bread maker, but it was a bit old and stale to the taste. You must admit, I had a rather multi-cultural meal tonight: Spanish rice eaten with Japanese chopsticks, followed by Italian and French. Hooray for diversity

I really am going to do that list of 50 things I want to do in my lifetime soon, Tara. I have a great book full of such things that I want to find to get some inspiration first, and it’s being quite elusive. I know that once I get started, I’ll probably end up with a few hundred rather than 50.

You may have noticed that I mentioned a cookie I picked up at work. Its official, I go back to the ol’ cookie job on Sunday. I arrived today to find a woman in there baking cookies. I was pissed. Lou was supposed to call me as soon as they allowed him to hire anyone, and so who was this chick doing my job? I waited around about a half hour until he got back, and he said that I’d be working her days off, and then do French Quarter when it opens in about 2 weeks. I didn’t want to question it with her there, but I fully intend to ask him what the hell is up with someone else there doing my job. I’ve been there since September- she should be working MY days off, not vice versa. Thankfully I should only have to do this for a few months. I’m actually pretty happy that I’ll only be working for two days a week for the next couple of weeks- it will be a nice way to drift back into it, plus things are insanely busy right now, and I’m not too excited to get thrown back into that. I really prefer the slow fall days when I can sit outside in the sunshine with a good book for almost an hour, but who wouldn’t? The things we do in our never-ending struggle for financial freedom.

posted by Crystal 8:42 PM

I completely forgot to tell you about my escapades downtown last week! One of the things that I love about downtown Branson is that there is practically no parking, so you have to search for a spot and then walk wherever you want to go. Most people probably consider this to be a vice, but for some reason it makes me feel like I live in a big city where people actually walk places, very Sex and the City-esque. I found a parking spot and set off across the street and then up the hill to my first destination- a used clothing store. My goal for the day was to hopefully find some new customers, while basically just shopping in the meantime. I had hoped that I could ask this store if I could put in a box where people could sign up for makeovers, like I did at the dress shop, but I later found that on the front door was a sign warning against any kind of selling or distributing materials or any such things, which discouraged me a lot, and made me decide not to pursue it. I must add that on my walk up the hill, I passed through one of my favorite little parts of that section of town. The sidewalk splits in half, and you can either follow it ramp-style on up the hill, or continue flat past some shops, with an increasingly tall wall of concrete separating you from the street. Then you climb a short set of steps to reach the surface, and to me it feels like you’re emerging from deep underground. Its one of those silly little things that is fun if you pay attention to it. I didn’t find much in the clothing store- I hadn’t expected to really. They had great prices on things, but nothing I would really wear. My next stop was a little gift shop I had spotted across the street that I had never even known existed. Inside, I the lady behind the counter (the only other person in the approximately 12 x 12 foot shop) told me that they made all of their own soaps and such, and told me about all of the products while I looked around. They had homemade soaps in various shapes, sizes and fragrances, candles, bath stuff, and a solid hand lotion that you rolled around in your hands like a ball. I found some adorable little lip-shaped soaps for under a dollar, and I really want to get the oatmeal scented one. I know, oatmeal sounds like a weird scent, doesn’t it? But this one was really nice, a very comforting sort of scent. My absolute favorite item in the store was soap that looked like a goldfish in a bag. They had a rubber goldfish surrounded by soap that looked like water, in a plastic bag. It looked pretty real, and was very cute, but $6, which is more than I can afford to spend on cute soap right now. I think I’m going to have to return there soon for some of the handmade oatmeal soap, because something like that is so cheap and simple, but would make me very happy.

Next I went to another store, and I’m not really sure how to describe their line of products. The window displayed stained glass work, and colored glass spirals that spun in the wind, which I heard one of the customers say were wonderful for keeping birds away. They sold real butterflies displayed in a box, which made me very sad. They sold chocolate candy that looked exactly like rocks. They sold lamps made by a local artist, one of which I really liked, but I didn’t look at the price tag, and probably wouldn’t want to. When the shopkeeper asked me if I needed help, I gave her my usual explanation- that I was a Mary Kay consultant putting together some gift baskets and trying to get some ideas for what to put in. I like that because for one, its true, second, its better than saying “Oh, I’m just looking” because it tells them what I do, and you never know when yet another person will say “Oh! My consultant moved last March and I’ve been looking for a new one!”. Anyway, the lady, who was probably in her seventies, proceeded to take me around the store and show me pretty much every item they had in stock. At one point, I said something along the lines of “Well, thanks!” and headed towards the door, but she was already off in another direction to show me something else that was “really collectible”, so I couldn’t just walk out. Five minutes and a sample of the candy that looked like rocks (tasted like MnM’s) later, I was finally out the door.

My final stop was the chocolate shop where my truck was parked. I tried a sample of their milk chocolate, and really wished I had the money to afford that or the sinfully delicious and rather expensive chocolate dipped oreos they had. It’s a place I’ll have to keep in mind if I really want to reward myself for something, or I’m having such a bad day that regular oreos cant cut it.

Despite what I’ve said about wanting to live in a big city for a while, I really do love living in a small one. On my way back to my truck, I saw a flashy new red grand am and had to stare, and as it grew closer, I could see the MK logo on the side. I could see that whoever inside was waving to me, and with some squinting, I saw that it was one of the DIQ’s in my unit. The same one I’d run into in a clothing store about two weeks ago. Most of the time, I love being able to run into someone I know almost every day, but on days when I look horrible and really don’t want to change out of my sweatpants and fix my hair just to run to the store, I desire the anonymity of living in a city with hundreds of thousands of people where the chances of running into three people you know on that quick run to the grocery store are much slimmer. I don’t think I’d want to live in a big city for good, but I really want to for a while.

Moving more towards the present, today has been a really good day in a simple pleasures kind of way. I am sitting here watching Sugar Daddy build a bubble nest, and Audrey showing all the signs of being ready to mate, and so now its just a matter of time before I put them together. That and I have to get over this fear of raising a bunch of fishy babies, and figuring out what I’ll do with them all once they hatch.

Speaking of which, here are two pictures of my beloved Audrey. I can’t get over how tiny she is in comparison to my other fish, so I took a picture of her with a penny, as well as one of her next to Bogart. Bogey is my biggest betta, and the darkish blur you see in the picture on the right.

posted by Crystal 8:30 PM

Well, it seems that I am going back to work on Sunday. I don't really know how to feel about that. It will be nice to get my mom to quit bitching about all the money I owe to this credit card and that credit card and this and that and so on and such. It gets very annoying to hear on a regular basis, as I cant exactly do anything about it that I'm not already doing. It looks like I'll just be working two or three days a week for the next few weeks, and then in 2 weeks when French Quarter opens up, I'll probably be over there full time. As nice of a job it is and everything, I sincerely hope I dont have to do it for more than a couple of months.
posted by Crystal 4:45 PM

Tuesday, April 02, 2002

Okay, I just discovered that we get a really cool sporty/outdoorsy channel that shows a lot of horse stuff. Nifty. Now the only question is if I want to stay up an extra hour to watch the lumberjacks. Nah.
posted by Crystal 10:31 PM

...In which Miss Audrey has arrived, and then I ramble on...

Today certainly had its high point. I went to wal-mart for no particular reason, and as usual found myself wandering over to check out the new bettas. My eyes went to a white one on the top shelf, thinking "That's funny, they dont usually have white.. and wow his fins are really short... OH MY GOSH! They got FEMALES!!" I picked out a super-cute feminine looking girl, and then figured that since I had no cash, it would be a good idea to check my bank account ballance to make sure I had enough for a fish. I ran to the ATM, and of course, discovered that I had exactly fourty-five cents in my account. No, I'm serious. I made it to the bank and back, happy to find that my chosen chick-fish was still there, and informed her on the drive home that there were 7 males who would be very excited to see her, and that her name was Audrey. I can't figure out which one of the fish to breed her to yet, and I want to read up on it more first (Conversation today: My sister- "Whatcha doing?" Me-"Reading about fish sex!" Sister-"Nevermind") I have this kinda scary mental picture of ending up with like 50 fish babies, and having nowhere to put them all. Would I actually be able to part with them to sell them? I'm leaning towards Sugar Daddy to be the designated breeding boy the first time around, but the whole decision isnt final.

WELL, now that you are caught up on the sex lives of my fish (Since I know you were dying to know!) lets move on! Is it time to worry about your life when that sort of thing is the main hilight of your day?

I woke up today convinced I'd sell $100, do 3 interviews, and get 5 bookings. Unfortunatly, my momentum wore off around 8am, and I have thus far only done one interview, and none of the other stuff. I'll go for it again tomorrow, I guess. I really hate that I have the most motivation and drive from around the time I wake up (4-6am-ish these days) until about 9am. Unfortunatly, anyone smart is asleep at that hour, so I can't make business calls, and hardly any businesses are open, so I cant go out and run errands or talk to people at their jobs. So I sit at home writing up this plan for the day that is great in theory, and then never really follow through. Its frustrating. I need more self discipline, I dont want to feel like I need someone standing over me poking me and telling me to get to work, I want to feel like I can handle that myself.

I did have a decent reason for not getting much done, my sister came for about four hours, sans kids this time, so I got a chance to just hang out and be goofy. We had a lovely time going through the music on my computer and singing along to "We are Siamese" and "Walking 'Round in Women's Underwear" Fun, fun fun.

You've probably noticed I'm rambling again. Honestly, its almost 10pm, and I've only written for 22 minutes so far today, which is obviously a bit short of the whole basis behind the April Hour A Day Dare. Thankfully, I've already blown 14 minutes writing here, so hopefully I will get to sleep eventually. Damn commitment. And yet notice that I stick to the commitment with no stakes and no real benifit, but screw up on the one that could make me some money and further my business. Humm.

I think I'm going to add another little category on the sidebar titled "Dollars in DVD Fund", because as I've probably mentioned, I've decided that its absolutly essential to my existance that I get a DVD player. The very cheapest one I can find is $89, and then I must have the Monty Python's Quest for the Holy Grail & Moulin Rouge DVD's to start off with, so I really need about $130. Current $ in DVD fund: $10. Thankfully, Netflix offers a free 30 day trial, so I'll have a whole month to come up with the $20 to pay for the following month of DVD goodness.

I ran into Susie twice today while I was out running errands and she was working (she delivers mail) We caught up on things a little bitm and I found out that she has a new stallion that I really need to go see, and that she has all of next week off, so I may be doing some riding. Sadly, she sold one of my favorite horses of hers, so I dont know which one I'll be riding in the future. I really didn't think she would ever sell that horse, but I guess nothing is final these days. At this point though, I really am not feeling picky about which horse I ride, I'm just dying to ride and re-connect with that whole part of myself. I really, really hope we can get in a few good rides soon.

Did I tell you that Amanda may be renting a house with a barn? I'll keep this short just in case I did, since I'm too lazy to look back and rememer everything I've said lately. Basically, if she gets this house, I'll not only have a MUCH more convenient place to keep Emmett, but somewhere to ride, too. I have my fingers and toes crossed on this one.

Sixteen minutes left. I think I'm going to go write some fun little haikus. Perhaps sometime soon I'll have something that I honestly feel is worth posting about.

It is so hard to concentrate on writing when Ozzy Osbourne is dressed up in Moulin Rouge garb on tv. This show will be the end of me, I tell you.
posted by Crystal 10:00 PM

Monday, April 01, 2002

Blogger is ignoring line breaks, and generally pissing me off- blah.

I spent the past 2 hours outside in the 80-ish sunshine painting, then attempting a henna tattoo on my ankle, and then reading. It was refreshing, to say the least.
posted by Crystal 1:40 PM

Oh man, sometimes ideas really do just smack right into you.

The Scene: Me sitting on my bed with a stack of magazines, Moulin Rouge soundtrack playing.

Me: What on earth am I going to make a collage about?

(Music) No matter what you say, the show is going our way...

Me: I want a theme, you know? I want this one to be about something...But what?

(Music) Freedom... Beauty...

Me: What could I have as my theme?

(Music) Truth and Love!

Me: I need a good theme, something I really like, but that I could also get creative with...

(Music) Freedom, Beauty, Truth and Love!

Me: Hey! How about Freedom, Beauty, Truth and Love!

It takes me a minute sometimes, you know.. I cant wait to see how this turns out, though.

I did finally remember a little bit about that dream that I had last night. All I remember is that my 2nd oldest sister was dating Tom Cruise, and they were staying at our house because we were all going somewhere, and I couldn't get over how weird it was to be eating breakfast with Tom Cruise. I really need to befriend a dream interpreter.
posted by Crystal 10:04 AM

Okay, the Moulin Rouge megamix ended up sucking, but I downloaded a file called "Come What May", which someone apparently just taped from the movie with a mic or something because the sound quality is atrocious, but it has the part I wanted, so I am absolutly giddy! Not only does it have the Children of the Revolution part, but it also has the "My gift is my song!" that I begged you all to find me a week or so ago. Yay! :) Now if only I can find this with decent sound quality, I will be HAPPY!

I also found the funniest thing ever! Its Nick Carter singin Uptown Girl when he was about 10! Its definitly him, I must sadly admit I could tell his voice anywhere. Too cute. My next quest is to download some stuff from when AJ did his Johnny No Name/Johnny Suede concerts!

I really need a redesign. I either want tropical or spring-y. If I go spring, I want pretty pastel colors, mostly pinks, butter yellow, mint green, and pale purple. So who has too much time on their hands and wants to put together a pretty design for me?
posted by Crystal 9:09 AM

You know, I think if the weather is halfway decent today, I am going to go out in public in shorts. Oh, the terror of pale white legs that have not yet seen the Spring sun meeting the light of day for the first time in months!

I am downloading a Moulin Rouge megamix, and I am very excited about it. In the meantime, I'm listening to "El Tango de Roxanne". I keep trying to download Children of the Revolution, but I keep getting the Bono version instead of the movie version. Give me my truth, beauty, freedom and love, damnit!
posted by Crystal 7:06 AM

I really need to get to work on things to send out for postcardx. Just a plain old postcard seems like the easy way out. I want to make silly little paintings, or find some great little poems or quotes that I want to share. Maybe I can get crafty and make something or another super-cheap. I know what kind of things I'd like to get....

AHH!! The Wiggles are back on TV! Make it stop!
posted by Crystal 6:55 AM

Today on Stanley I learned that if you fill your house with water and sprinkle in some salt, sharks will come out of your book and swim around your house. I love educational TV.
posted by Crystal 6:50 AM

Oh no, this song is going to be stuck in my head ALL DAY, I know it, but I just cant change the channel, I'm entranced! There are four men on the Disney channel, a group called "The Wiggles" They are dressed in black pants and long-sleeved t-shirts of various bright colors, which makes them look a bit like they belong on Star Trek. They are singing about animals. "Here comes the Wombat, crawling, crawling.." They are making motions too. I got a big kick out of the guy jumping like a kangaroo. So here's where my mind automatically wanders: What do these guys say when people ask them what they do for a living? Do they reply with as much dignity and sophistication they can muster "I am a Wiggle. You may recognize our latest song..'Here comes the kangaroo, hopping, hopping!'" Maybe they just lie and say they are an accountant.

I had a dream last night. Apparently this dream was so witty and amusing that when I woke up from it, I laughed and jotted down some notes so that I could remember it and tell everyone about it. Sounds like a good plan, right? Well the problem is that I didnt actually wake up and write notes, that too was part of the dream! So, I had a dream that I had a neat dream. I'm not sure what that means.

My bird Bosco, who generally wont let me within a foot of him without throwing a fit, has suddenly decided that I give great head rubs. I stuck my hand in yesterday to try to get him out, but instead he put his head up against my finger, betting to be petted. Wonders never cease.

Pizza and mini hershey's bars for breakfast while watching Playhouse Disney. This is what my life has become. How am I still managing to lose weight eating like this?
posted by Crystal 6:48 AM

Yesterday was pretty interresting for a day when nothing happened. I woke up at 6am, continuing that horrible trend of waking up too early. I must have been having a creative day, because I really wanted to paint all day. I sketched out an idea for something I wanted to paint, but then I couldn't find my paints! Slightly discouraged, I decided I wanted to play with my henna tattoo stuff, and make the tribal sun design that I drew on my ankle with a pen last a bit longer. I managed to find my henna paste, but we had no lemon juice, which I needed to help keep the paste wet. Curses, foiled again! I finally settled for working on a collage while sprawled out on my bed with a stack of magazines watching movies on USA. I found some pretty good stuff, but I still have this feeling of lack of satisfaction from not getting to do either of the two things I was really in the mood to do. In a burst of energy, I decided I would make up for the lack of nifty art stuff by going tanning, and then swinging by the store for some watercolors and lemon juice. Then, of course, it occured to me that it was Easter, and that neither the tanning palce nor the store would be open! Sometimes, you just have to admit defeat.
posted by Crystal 6:27 AM

Okay, ready for the somewhat shocking news? I think I'm going to get a job for a couple of months. Yes, take a moment to pick your jaw up off the floor, I have my reasons here. Yes, I adore being able to drastically change my sleep schedule on a weekly basis, and all of the other freedoms that go along with only being self employed. However, there are a lot of Pretty Things out there (shoes, DVD players, um.. food) that I really feel I must acquire. There are also these neat envelopes that seem to flood my mailbox on a daily basis from all of these places claiming I owe them unbelievable amounts of money. I feel like I really should humor them and send in the requested payments, and you just cant do that on the meager weekly unemployment check. And then yesterday, I got into a discussion about financial situations with my mom. She said that we should be getting the money from selling my uncle's appartment buildings in Santa Monica within a few months, so if I will just get a normal job until then, they will help me out bigtime financially when the money comes. I must admit, I am not above major charity, so I'm playing with this idea. I can do a normal job for a couple of months, right? It would be one of those "enriching experiences", right? So, I suppose I'll go talk to Lou again this morning, or tomorrow, or.. well, you all know how my schedule tends to run. If I can't get back to work there within a week or so, I shall go off on the mighty Job Search. I am NOT going back to Dixie (ahem, KENNY). I'm thinking about applying at the Disney store down here, and if that doesnt work out, I'm not really sure. I live in a town where businesses are practically beating down your door this time of year in search of help, so finding *a* job won't be a problem, but finding one I want to deal with for two months may be a bit trying. I wish we had a really interresting coffee shop here, I'd get a job there, just so I could be a Coffee Shop Girl. Maybe I'll work in some kind of clothing store. I don't know, I'll figure it out when the time comes. Getting back to the actual point though, it seems I'm going to go on a job search. I'm going to continue to work my business at the same time though, and hopefully all the new people I will meet from said job will help that along, too. Plus, it will get me out of the house on a somewhat regular basis, and really just be something interresting. And the cash. The money. Yay.

Its now 6am, so hopefully I will start to be slightly more coherent sometime soon. I will probably re-read this entry around noon and want to kick myself, but that's life. Yes, 6am, by the way. For the past several days, I have been waking up around 5am. Today, I woke up at 4, and despite all tries to fall back asleep just for a few more hours, I was not victorious, so I lay in bed and watched Monty Python on BBC America, followed by MTV. I love love love really late night/early morning MTV because they play all the videos that aren't good enough to be on during normal hours, and you see some of the craziest stuff. This is where I first saw that "You and me baby ain't nothing but mammals" video long before anyone else had heard of it. I would be talking to Amanda Hunter late at night, and around the same time every night, one of us would have to point out "The Mammal video is on!" Oh, memories! :)

My main goal for today is to figure out what I'm going to write for the rest of the month. I have a few vague story ideas I want to work on, I'll probably do some poetry, etc. I just dont want to end up in front of the computer writing random crap for an hour a day.

Our meeting tonight really does not sound worth going to. Should I quote the email? Nah, I'll paraphrase. Basically, we're all supposed to bring our cell phones and call a bunch of our customers to book appointments with them. I can do that at home any day, whats the point of dedicating an entire two hour meeting to it? I'm hoping its some kind of april fools joke, and we will actually have a normal meeting. I'm really torn over wether to go or not at this point, because I have about three people that I really need to call, and the rest of the time would feel like such a waste. However, Amanda is opening tonight, and I really want to be there for that. I guess I'll decide at some point today. I know I should go, and I probably will, I'm just not looking forward to it.

I am still tempted to pack up and move to a big city for a while, just for the experience. I could get a nice little apartment where I'd live alone, or maybe with a cat, and just see what its like for a while. I could go the in-between route and move somewhere like St. Louis that isn't very far away, or Springfield which is bigger than here, but not a big city by any means, but if I'm going to do it, I want to go all or nothing and go somewhere like NYC, San Francisco, New Orleans, etc. I've been reading a lot of novels (okay, 2) set in the South lately, so New Orleans has been sounding appealing. Maybe I should move to Texas. Maybe I should actually get that job and get some money first before I start considering moving halfway across the country. Humm, there's an idea.
posted by Crystal 6:14 AM

I was thrilled to see a Michelle Branch video on MTV this morning, and now the one by that chick who looks like Michelle's long lost twin that plays the piano is on. Its so refreshing to see young girls who have actual talent and dont have to parade around half naked to show it off. I must download this song. Hell, I may even actually buy the CD just to support the cause.

Speaking of music downloads, I've decided to give up on Morpheous, because its just been useless lately. Therefore, I'm back with Audiogalaxy which is being painfully slow, but at least its accomplishing something. Right now I'm downloading "Children of the Revolution" from the Moulin Rouge soundtrack. Yep.

Today, being April 1st, is the beginning of the "April Hour A Day Writing Thingey" (I forgot the real name, shoot me). If you can't figure it out from the title, a bunch of us have promised to write for an hour a day every day this month. I am NOT counting this particular post as writing time, as its not even 6am yet, and therefore I am very, very incoherent, and just babbling to get my brain woken up. Expect a real entry later.
posted by Crystal 5:50 AM

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